Poem A Day Challenge November 2018. Day 1: Glorious

Welcome Back

Hooray, well if you are reading this we made it to November, and if you need help for the next 30 days, here is it. Over on Writers Digest they do this wonderful challenge in April and November of posting a poetry prompt for every day. For some reason this time of year is my most poetical. And even when I don’t feel able to write, I still enjoy collecting the prompts in a note book for another day. So my fellow stationary junkies lets find our favorite pens and notebooks and gets started. I dedicate this poem to the wonderful people at Writers Challenge for all they do and for this wonderful challenge.

Glorious

A glorious day to be alive,

A poetry challenge, here I spy.

There’s 30 days to sit and  ponder,

Write some words, and create wonder.

Gather now, with pen in hand,

Let’s all write, it will be grand.

Writer’s Digest – ‘Hey, High Five’

Your challenge, helps me stay alive.

 

As someone who struggles big time in the dark evenings with depression and anxiety. These poetry challenges are a real life line, a reason to get up and check in, to see what the days prompt is. (I’m old school n don’t have a smart phone). I don’t always write a poem every day, but I write the prompts down and let them roll round my head and see what falls out. If nothing, that’s ok, they can stay in the journal for another day. Sorry didn’t mean to make that rhyme. But its nice to have something other than worries rolling around in my head so the PAD challenges are a good idea.

As for the punctuation, yeah I do struggle with that, thanks to dyslexia. I go for the write the words out, (brain dump) read it out loud n see what sounds like a gap to breathe, (stick a full stop in or comma, here n there. Hopefully since its not going to be sent in anywhere for marking, its just for making a little while seem softer and for the pleasure of writing, then it  will be ok.

This is for everyone, you don’t have to share your results anywhere, just grab a piece of paper a pencil or pen and give it a go. Stationary junkies, its a good excuse to dig out your fave pens, I’ve just invested in some nice lettering pens, so maybe some of these will get written in to the ‘best’ notebook with some brush lettering titles. You know you are a stationary ‘junkie’ when your ‘rough’ book for poetry is a Moleskine! Gotta love that Moleskine paper. For those now wondering what my ‘best notebook is..’ I’ll add a link below. But seriously you can write on the back of junk mail if you don’t have a notebook, its all good. If you have those cheapie mini white boards, they can be good as you can move the words around till they sound right too 🙂

Links

• Writers Digest
• Day one prompt
• Weekly Poetry Prompts, the site also puts up weekly poetry prompts on a Wednesday.
• Robert Lee Brewer, the guy who makes all this happen
• Moleskine UK
• Papuro Milano Refillable Handmade Italian Journal. Here they are on Pilotfish, trading as The Online Pen company. Mine is the aubergine one, looks blue on screen but is delicious deep purple in real life. You can buy blank or lined paper for them too.

Best wishes and thanks for reading, see you soon

Billie

 

Poem A Day April 2018 and healing

Hi

Is this really the first post of the year?! Suffice to say its been that kinda year, nuff said. Heads up for Aprils Poem a Day challenge over on the awesome Writers Digest website.

Poetry

These wonderful people have a challenge in April and November where they post a prompt every day. The rest of the year its a promt on Wednesdays for poetry. I’m not good with deadlines, so tbh I tend to make note of them in a little book and go to them when I am in a calmer headspace.

I’m not one of those people who sit down to write poems, my poems tend to pounce on me, I’m feeling a certain feeling, words swirling like bee’s in my head then sometimes, suddenly they seem to start flowing together and I think, ohh I quite like that, lets write it down. For me its quite a healing thing writing, journalling, poem-ing (its prob not a word but I am calling it that, coz Im sure I’ ve read that somewhere or other. If its a thing do let me know 🙂

Art Saves

In other news (as its been so long) I’ve been reading a truely awesome book called ‘What your clutter trying to tell you?’ OMG life changer, game changer. I have a lot of stuck energy, a lot of things I no longer want or need yet feel too attatched to to, let them go somewhere else. That book is really helping me re frame.

What has this to do with art??? Well it brought me back to someone who changed my life and gave me the courage to start my other blog Billie’s Craft Room, gee almost 10 years ago now! Her name Kelly Rae Roberts.

BUT

Decluttering is still a challenging process for me, and although after a while the open space it creates ultimately feels good, in the short term it is painful. I need time to mentally grieve for stuff I ‘have to let go of’ and it needs a cry, a sleep and to be honoured, not corrected n told off. I do that a lot to myself and want a kinder approach.

As a result I took March as a month for ‘me’ for self care and kindness. I’m processing a lot of pain atm and selfcare and ‘me’ anything is just not something I do. But after someone treating me very badly it taught me once and for all that there are worse things than being alone, and that’s being around people who judge, correct and shame me when they have no clue of what things are like or feel like. I loved the phrase about parenting yourself and understanding that endings hurt and to go slow and gentle.

What did self care look like, {shuffles feet} a heck of a lot of manifesting! I know classic horder, get stuff out of the house and the instant reaction is replace is asap, but I was creating tlc sacred space, working out what I NEED to feel nurtured, honoured and loved. For me it was much as it has been since a child, not people but books, art supplies, and a card deck or three.

You want to know what or which? Please leave a comment to ask me as I will share if asked but don’t want this to turn into a ‘look at all my stash’ kinda post. I plan to blog a bit more to share ‘stuff’ that has been part of my healing journey. I write when I can, but the ‘black dog’ has been flattening me this year and it takes a lot of energy to wrestle with it.

Kelly Rae Roberts

This is WAY too late in the post to get to this but if you haven’t heard of her before please, please check out Kelly Rae Roberts, she is a mixed media artist and her courses are SO healing. I started her Wear You Joy eclass as I quickly read between the lines and saw it was about much more than the contents of your wardrobe and more about finding who you are right now and that is very much the page of discover and healing I’m trying to process at the moment. Kelly Rae also had an awesome offer which at last I was in the right place at the right time to jump in with  and bundled her Mixed Media Mantra class and her Angel mantras. I’ve wanted to do those two classes for SOOOO long.

Thank you Kelly Rae for your special offers and to the Universe for waking me up in time for the deal.

Susannah Conway: Your Souls Speaks

Online class about listening to your intuition. Wonderful, I’ve been saving the emails as got poorly and couldn’t process when it was live but its waiting for me and I love it. Again very much tlc.

Allow

Most of the time its the voice that says; couldn’t shouldn’t mustn’t, can’t, that wins but for March I tried a quieter one that said: ‘Just say yes’. My heart, my soul and my intuition do nudge me toward good things, happy things, kind things but the negative voice mostly wins. My word for the year is ALLOW, so for a month I stepped out of my own way and treid to do just that; Allow.

Links

• Writers Digest  Keep an eye on the ‘Whats new area of the site for each days poetry prompt.
• Kelly Rae Roberts
• Susannah Conway
• What your clutter is trying to tell you. Amazon UK

 

Feel Good Friday 4. The Sacred Alone

Welcome Back

We made it through another week, phew, how was it for you? Its that time in the week where we treat ourselves to a little something special to celebrate making it though. As we near the end of this course with me, I want to share details of the most wonderful e-course which I took earlier in the year and would highly recommend to everyone. Its called The Sacred Alone by Susannah Conway.

The Sacred Alone

Like me Susannah was widowed young and has had to find new ways to find her way in the world. This course isn’t just for the bereaved, its for anyone who is or feels alone and really isn’t that cool with it…YET. This course is so amazing, kind, nurturing, healing. Becoming used to being alone is a process and evolution takes time but with this course she helps you find ways that make it feel different, kinder, softer, less intimidating.

This course was a life changer to me, and using the practices from it I hope will help me through another long winter. During the course you will receive a daily email, Monday to Friday with such healing words of hope n comfort and at the end a pdf to download and keep of the entire course, which I love! There is mindfulness, meditation and visualizations. Let’s let Susannah explain more about it on her website

• Susannah Conway
• The Sacred Alone

You deserve to treat yourself to this, if you read the description and like I did, cry because it sounded so perfect, then listen to your heart and go for it.

Best wishes and thanks for reading, see you soon, Namaste.

 

Wellness Wednesday 3: Gratitude

Welcome Back

This is the day to check in with ourselves to see how things are going, and how we can look for ways to tweak what is no longer working for us. Today I’d like to talk about Gratitude practices.

When something happens to us, we react, one of two ways; from a place of fear or a place of love. When we have been stuck in a headspace of fear for a long time, its all we can see, we can loose sight of anything good that may be happening.

First thing first, please check out Davidji’s video about 16 seconds, its a way of not reacting so fast but taking a moment to pause, to gather and center yourself before you respond. He says reacting is reACTING re creating old patterns of behavior that we may not like in ourselves or mean or want to continue with. Lets take a moment n watch that video before we go on.

David ji 16 Seconds

Makes you think doesn’t it, when people say things to you that hurt, when you tell someone something and hoped they would show you love or praise but they don’t they ridicule you or ignore it like your special ‘thing’ you shared wasn’t that special. If you take that moment you can ask yourself, is their reaction from a place of love or fear? You don’t know what happened to them earlier in the day or week to leave them in a headspace where they can’t find loving words. Instead of giving them their same energy back, step away, no one said that everyone is going to love everything you do. They might be entitled to their opinion, but in the same way you are not required to agree with it.

Gratitude

Lets find some love in the world. NOT from others but from ourselves. How can we start to notice good things happening? Well we could journal it, decide to make a note of every time something positive happens, anything that makes us smile. REALLY small things count, for example, Its sunny: so my pain will be less today, I won’t get wet going where I’m going. Yey I thought I’d run out of milk but there was another in the back of the fridge after all.

If you are glued to your phone, you could photograph things that make you happy and make that a mindfulness focus. Perhaps picking a theme for the day, notice flowers, or pick a colour and photograph things in your day that are that colour? The plan is to stop and notice things around us.

For me, as a shut in (agoraphobic) I like colour in my world, so have a dish of pretty marbles, and when I notice something good, (or not as terrible as usual,  if you are in that head space) put a marble in a different dish. This is also good if you can’t write for long either, lost count, not sure if you have counted something already, don’t worry if you noticed it again, it counts again.

Gratitude Practice with marbles

What have I got to be grateful for?

Lets see, what is there to be grateful for at the most fundamental level and move out from there. Do you have shelter? Do you have clean water to drink? Do you have food in the house or that you can get? Can you see? Can you hear? Can you move? Has someone spoken to you today? Can you go out? Did you have breakfast, dinner, tea? See where I’m going with this, when you start to notice the things around you, even before you step out of the door for those more able, there are still things that you have that others don’t, perhaps never have had and perhaps never will have.

Keep it small and simple. You could use two pots n a pile of pens or pencils anything that works for you. All you need to do is be here, do your thing and notice what isn’t so bad in the day. Then at the end of the day, look at all the marbles of gratitude, DON’T count them! Its not about judgement in the sense of; there were more yesterday, I should have or wanted more. Its only about there are some things today that weren’t so bad. Good things did happen to me today, there were kind things in my world today.

Notice the small things that are trying to show you kindness. They really matter. Can you offer someone a smile today? Help their gratitude pot, you never know, they might just smile back 😉

Did you give this a go? What worked for you, how do you notice things to be grateful for?

Best wishes and thanks for reading, see you soon. Namaste

Wellness Wednesday 2; Achievement Cards

Welcome Back

Today’s the day to check in with ourselves and ask ‘How are things going?’ There are times, when the world spins too fast, and times when some of us fall off. For those times, when you just can’t cope, here is an idea to help get you through; A set of Achievement Cards. You are welcome to use the idea for your own life and modify it accordingly. If you find it helpful, a link back here would be appreciated.

Achievement Cards

Achievement Cards; Rewards and Healing

To make your cards

You Will Need

A sheet of paper to plan.

Some card, cut into pocket size rectangles, I went for 2.5 x 3.5″ as you can cut quite a few from an A4 sheet but you can buy packs of ATC cards in this size pre-cut if you don’t want to cut your own.

I used different coloured card, for different groups but you could go with white and highlighters or coloured pens/pencils or stickers to categorize if you like.

If coloured card doesn’t work for you, use a symbol for different sections instead.

Method

Make a list of tasks, under each of these categories on your planning sheet.

• Essentials
• Indoors
• Outdoors
• Healing: things you find nurturing and healing
• Rewards: (see Feel good fridays, think things from your What Lights me up list. A magazine, something from your wishlist, something that makes you feel good about you.

From this list create your personalized deck of cards.

Use different coloured card or symbol for each of the categories.

How to use your deck

If you are going to bed feeling bad, put out some cards for the next day. Essentials are essential, so get those out first, in the order they need doing. Next add in something from your indoors or outdoors list if you would like to have a go at one of those too. If you are feeling better put out what needs doing, if you feel bad, just lay out what is achievable plus rewards and healing cards.

Achievement Cards: Essentials

Add in a healing or reward card for each of the bigger goals you set. This maybe where you need to give a bit more thought to your rewards and to keep costs sensible use things like wearing my fave jumper, watching my fave film, tea from my favorite cup, a nice bubblebath, sometimes there is a cross over from Healing things and rewards so go with what ever feels right at the time. Its about supporting yourself through difficult times. If you have done something you feel is massive, you totally deserve a reward accordingly. Perhaps something from your wish list or from your Happy Box if you have been putting out treasured items into one for your friday rewards.

Achievement Cards: Tasks or Goals

Achievement Cards; Rewards and Healing

 

Stack them up rather than spread them out, so they feel less intimidating and stack them in the order you would like to do them. As you complete a task then is the time to lay them in a line, this is an important visual reward for achiving things, it might sound daft but believe me when the world feels that dark it can make a big difference. At bedtime you can look at your card spread and say however bad it felt I did achieve all this. Its important to honor the page that you are on, your current abilities and health, please don’t use this as another way to beat yourself up over what you couldn’t do. Tomorrow is another day, things may go differently tomorrow.

These cards help with keeping you on track when your head is all over the place and you can’t remember what you have done, or needs doing. This way you don’t have to hold it in your head all day. If you need some help perhaps someone else can help by laying out the cards of the day for you, as long as they know your current state well enough not to set the task too high. Also just because a card is out, it might not mean its something for you to personally do, say you have the card ‘Mow the lawn’ if you physically can’t it can be used as a reminder to ask someone else to do this task for you.

I’d be very interested in how you get on with these cards, I do hope they help you through difficult days too. Help you feel empowered and owning what you have achieved especially when ‘just’ eating three times in a day is massive for you.

Sending you peace and light, may your day be as gentle as possible. Namaste

 

 

Feel Good Friday 2. Kyle Gray

Welcome Back

We made it through another week! How was it for you? Its treat day, what are you going to treat yourself to today?

Self Love September Bookshelf

This week I’d like to offer you Kyle Gray’s book 111 Ways to Raise your Vibration as a suggestion for your wishlist.

This book has a daily passage to read that is full of love and positive affirmations to help you feel more hopeful and positive about your day. Thought for the day lets say.

After taking Susannah Conways ecourse The Sacred Alone (more on that soon) I now have a daily spiritual practice, where I sit, meditate, draw some cards and then read a passage for this BEFORE I do anything else. This has had a massive impact on my anxiety and I highly recommend you seeking ways to find what helps you make right now feel softer, in ways that feel safe to you.

This may not be achievable for you everyday but it is a wonderful way to start your day, or perhaps to end your day, whenever you can carve yourself some time to be still and be in your body n listen to yourself n work on your needs.

Now I discovered Kyle after buying a copy of Kindred Spirit Magazine earlier in the year and I liked how he was in to meditation, and some Buddhist stuff too. Please know I’m not trying to push anyone into anything spiritual, I respect we are all in our own spaces about that, and if you aren’t on the same page as him during the introduction, please keep reading and go with the daily pages as they are universal and healing very similar to mindfulness practices.

If you would like to find out more about Kyle Gray here is where you can find out more

Kyle Gray website

Kyle Gray Raise Your vibration video

May your day be as kind and gentle as possible, would love to hear what your treat of the week will be if you would like to share it in your comments. Best wishes and thanks for reading. Namaste

Choices poem in response to Mean Girl poem

Welcome Back

In response to my Mean Girl poem, I also wrote this. Sometimes those around us, even with the best intent say things that hurt and wound us. When you are unwell those negative comments can go round and round in your head and hurt you further. Here is my kinder way to process those times.

Choices

I choose not to listen, to the mean things that you say.

However well intentioned, they hurt and cannot stay.

I choose, not to talk to you, I have no words today.

I’m saving up my energy, to find the strength to stay.

 

I choose not to listen to the mean things that I say

I know they’re from the mean girl,

Who knows just what to say.

If I do not listen to her, may be she’ll go away.

 

I choose to be gentle and extra kind to me

Because I do deserve it and I’m trying to be free.

I turn away, from the dark clouds, that chase and frighten me,

There is a nicer person, who is also inside me.

 

The one who likes to do art,

The one who really cares

The one who’ll always listen

The one who wants to share.

 

Each day is full of choices.

Even though they feel so hard

I will try to choose the gentler ones

Be kinder to my heart.

 

Best wishes and thanks for reading

B x

 

The Mean Girl

Welcome Back

They often say you shouldn’t listen to the negative narration in your life, but its not always easy not too. Today’s poem explores that.

Mean Girl

A mean girl lives inside me,

She’s really not my friend

She’s made of all the dark stuff

And makes me cry again.

 

She whispers bad memories to me,

She narrates my every day

But coz she’s full of bad stuff

She knows just what to say.

 

She often leaves me crying

Lying shaking on the floor,

Not wanting to get up again,

I don’t want anymore.

 

I shouldn’t listen to her,

I know she isn’t being kind.

But she really is persuasive

And lives inside my mind

 

Sometimes she has a day off.

And Oh what joy that brings

To have some space and quietness

It really gives me wings.

 

I’m learning not to listen,

To the bad stuff that she says

To wait until she’s finished

Then do something else instead.

 

Alternative last line….

‘And just go back to bed.’

 

Best wishes and thanks for reading, see you soon

(version 2)

 

B x

We Are

As a follow on to the I am poem, here is my ‘We are’ poem, dedicated to all those who need help but are unable to access it. Sending us all Peace, hope, light and compassion.

We are the silent warriors

The ones who hide our pain,

The ones who cannot find our words,

Nor ways to ease the blame.

 

If you have a mental illness

Society needs to change,

Coz we are, still made to hide it,

And live our lives with shame.

 

Oh there are some, who do find help

But many more that don’t

You call us weak, but you are wrong

You do not have a clue.

 

The courage, strength and fight it takes

To make it each day through.

How easily you judge us,

When you do not know our pain.

 

I hope one day the change will come

And no one, will have to hide

That compassion and hope can help us find

Our needed sense of pride.

 

Best wishes and thanks for reading

B x

I am. Poem

After watching Gareth Malone and his Invictus choir; I was inspired to write my own poem. I am not an ex military anything, but struggle daily with mental and physical challenges. Here is  my tribute to all of us, who suffer silently with wounds the world can’t see and rarely understand.

I am

I am a warrior, to make it though the night.

The things I feel, the things I think,

They give me such a fright.

 

I am a warrior, to make it though the day.

The fear, the anguish and the pain

Are the price that I must pay.

 

I am a warrior, in everything I do.

Those ‘simple’ things, that you can do

You have no concept of how hard,

They are for me to do.

 

I am a warrior, I need to tell myself.

To give me strength and hope and fight

To face this battle, day and night.

 

Links

This was the Invictus Choir that inspired my poem. Bless you all your courage is inspiring. May you find your peace, hope & light. x

 

 

Best wishes and thanks for reading

Bx